I usually spend some time trying to come up with clever titles for my articles. Sometimes I'm successful and sometimes I'm not. However, I broke with tradition and had this week's main title simply as "Dan is a moron" (I tried to be clever with the sub-title but was only partially successful). While this main title is simplistic, it gets right to the point, and after watching the third episode of Survivor-Amazon one would be hard pressed to disagree with the statement.
There are a couple of things that will put you on the short list of folks being considered for dismissal when a vote comes up in tribal council. Refusing to help, and having an attitude about it, is foremost on that list. Dan arrived in the Amazon with an attitude and only helped in camp chores when repeatedly asked. He then complained that Roger was often "bossy" and had an attitude like a "drill sergeant." Well buddy, when someone in the platoon is a worthless lazy punk sometimes a drill sergeant is needed.
Dan also didn't help himself with his performance during this week's reward challenge. The reward challenge was a memory game where the tribes had to match pairs of items (soap, scissors, conditioner, etc.) by asking other members if they had similar items. (A simpler version of "Go Fish" I suppose...) During this competition Dan asked Heidi for conditioner...a question just posed to Heidi by Rob! Dan's inattention, probably caused by a petulant adolescent desire just to talk to Heidi, was a major factor in Tambaqui's defeat in this challenge. At that point in time I'm sure the other Tambaqui tribe members wanted to drag Dan's worthless hide back to camp to administer a little Survivor justice.
However, the Tambaqui's defeat in the immunity challenge was a team effort in incompetence. Their aim of escaping from a cell constructed of wood slats by sequentially untying knots and obtaining the necessary artifacts was painfully slow as they were reduced to rubbing an offending knot against the machete as opposed to actually swinging the machete against the rope. You're guys! Come on! You're supposed to know how to use a machete!
The loss in the immunity challenge was the death knell for Dan. He was unanimously voted out of the Tambaqui tribe but his attitude problem remained intact. As a parting statement he said "somebody put a stop payment on Roger's reality check."
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